deconversion

But most of us eventually notice that winning an argument requires that the vanquished recognize his defeat. Sure enough, time after time, I would be amazed and incensed when the other person — apparently unaware of his demise — came back with more nonsense.

I came to realize that these exchanges accomplish precisely nothing but lost time and gained blood pressure. He comes back, I reply, again and again. We consult our mutually-exclusive rulebooks to see who’s winning. And oh how the pretty painted ponies go round and round.

I want those hours back.

This article was particularly timely for me. I'm almost exactly a year out from the spark that triggered my eventual deconversion and I still find myself "needing" to show people how they're wrong when they post ignorant religious stuff. Even though I KNOW I'm never going to change their mind, I still feel the need to engage in the "I'm right and your wrong and how can you not plainly see that I'm right and you're wrong" game.

It makes me wonder when, if ever, I'll be able to get to a point where my atheism isn't a label that defines me but just a non-issue that happens to be a part of who I am but never really gets discussed like, "I'm an American. I'm left-handed. I like coffee."

I've always had a big part of my personality that was never able to leave well enough alone whenever I heard somebody say something that I "knew" to be wrong. I was literally a happier, more energetic person, when I was pissed off and arguing with somebody. But now as I settle comfortably into my 30's with a career and a family who loves me, I wonder if it's time to stop fighting and just live and let live... as opposed to making everybody see and understand MY SIDE.

Anyway, here's the article:

http://parentingbeyondbelief.com/blog/?p=3241