Another Ah ha! moment
Well, I wrote to my friend who never responded to my critique of
the article he sent me.
He wrote back right away, begging off saying he had been very busy. I believe him, I know how busy he is.
But... he asked something that just seems incredulous to me now:
"I question why you need to have evidence for proof of things told in the Word? What has happened to faith in things you can't see, believing in things that you can't touch? Even Yeshua said blessed are those who believe and who have not seen. To me the whole thing about faith in the God of the Bible s trusting in something you cannot prove.
I guess the difference between you and I is that I don't need the hard evidence to continue my faith in the God of the Bible. I'm sure that seems crazy to you now, trusting in something you can't see or prove, but that is where I am."
Now, this guy is not an idiot. The main reason I talked with him is I thought that he would contemplate what I said. Obviously not.
But, this reply did a couple of things for me:
1) It confirmed that I am no longer a christian because my reaction to his statements was, "You've got to be f--ing kidding! You need NO evidence whatsoever about the bible? You just believe it?" I am still in shock. His statement about seeming crazy to me is an understatement, to say the least!
2) It showed me what true believers are and made me think that maybe I never was one. My reasoning is, if my friend's attitude is typical of a true believer, I never fit them mold. I always ASSUMED that there was reasonable evidence to support the bible. I don't recall ever being of a mind that said it didn't matter if I could prove it or not, I would believe it. I'm too much a sceptic for that.
So the reason for my apostasy is simple. I was never a TRUE believer as defined by my friend's attitude. And, once I investigated my assumptions, I found them to be wrong. There is no support for the bible. I'm too much a realist to say, "Well, I don't care if there is evidence that validates the bible or not, I'm going to believe it anyway". I just can't go there.
That was my "Ah ha!" My friend inadvertently made me realize that I am truly a deconvert. This isn't some phase I'm going through, I'm done with christianity and religion in general. I can't go back because I know too much. And it seems that I can't go back because I think.
I wish I could, life would be so much simpler.
He wrote back right away, begging off saying he had been very busy. I believe him, I know how busy he is.
But... he asked something that just seems incredulous to me now:
"I question why you need to have evidence for proof of things told in the Word? What has happened to faith in things you can't see, believing in things that you can't touch? Even Yeshua said blessed are those who believe and who have not seen. To me the whole thing about faith in the God of the Bible s trusting in something you cannot prove.
I guess the difference between you and I is that I don't need the hard evidence to continue my faith in the God of the Bible. I'm sure that seems crazy to you now, trusting in something you can't see or prove, but that is where I am."
Now, this guy is not an idiot. The main reason I talked with him is I thought that he would contemplate what I said. Obviously not.
But, this reply did a couple of things for me:
1) It confirmed that I am no longer a christian because my reaction to his statements was, "You've got to be f--ing kidding! You need NO evidence whatsoever about the bible? You just believe it?" I am still in shock. His statement about seeming crazy to me is an understatement, to say the least!
2) It showed me what true believers are and made me think that maybe I never was one. My reasoning is, if my friend's attitude is typical of a true believer, I never fit them mold. I always ASSUMED that there was reasonable evidence to support the bible. I don't recall ever being of a mind that said it didn't matter if I could prove it or not, I would believe it. I'm too much a sceptic for that.
So the reason for my apostasy is simple. I was never a TRUE believer as defined by my friend's attitude. And, once I investigated my assumptions, I found them to be wrong. There is no support for the bible. I'm too much a realist to say, "Well, I don't care if there is evidence that validates the bible or not, I'm going to believe it anyway". I just can't go there.
That was my "Ah ha!" My friend inadvertently made me realize that I am truly a deconvert. This isn't some phase I'm going through, I'm done with christianity and religion in general. I can't go back because I know too much. And it seems that I can't go back because I think.
I wish I could, life would be so much simpler.
9 Comments
This is where I like science more and more. Sure, scientists disagree, and they aren't always right. But science starts out with the assumption it is not the end of the world if a theory or hypothesis can be demonstrated to be false. Mainstream science ended up rejecting the creationist view of the world because the evidence that has been accumulating for the last 150 years has increasingly supported Darwin's view. If someone were to come up with a hypothesis that demonstrated that Darwin was wrong, and if enough evidence accumulated to support that view, science would abandon Darwinism. Science isn't based on something as nebulous as faith. It isn't based on wishful thinking. And unfortunately, because of the kind of thinking skills it demands, science often does end up the enemy of faith, even though it does not set out to be.
I hadn't realized that, but you are absolutely right!
I had thought that this friend was someone I could talk to and debate with, but now? I don't think so. How do you reason with someone who sticks their fingers in their ears and yells, "la-la-la!" the whole time your trying to make a point? I keep thinking of the scene from Miracle on 34th Street where little Susan keeps repeating, "I believe. I believe. It's silly, but I believe".
If I were you I would want my friend to know exactly what you just wrote here. I would ask him if he believes that it doesn't matter whether or not the Bible's claims about life, the earth, the universe, and humanity are scientifically valid. How is it a beautiful wonderful story if it doesn't hold up? How is it true if what we see in the earth's crust and under the microscope completely contradict it? It is one thing to have faith in things you can't see - it is another to have faith in things that are in complete opposition to what you can see before your eyes. The whole reason that the Biblical story was beautiful to me was because I believed it was TRUE...actually true. If scientific discoveries show that it is not true, how can a person not be impacted by that? How is a false account still beautiful?
Sorry - that's my reaction to your friend. To me, it would be worth writing these things to a friend. I don't like being misunderstood, and I don't like seeing my friends fooled. Of course, I am still in the closet with a lot of them, so I can understand if you don't want to go there too!
Thomas required evidence to believe, and he got it. Why can't we?
That's a great suggestion! I'm waiting to see how he respondes to my last email. If he seems open to discussion, I'll raise that point, but if he doesn't I don't think I'm going to waste my time on someone who has already made up their mind.
Snuggly,
I'm with you. I was always sympathetic to Thomas. I have never thought his attitude was unreasonable. If someone came to me today and claimed there was a resurrection, I'd want to see the resurrected person. It's not like resurrections happen every day.
Ask a christian what the difference is between a cult and their belief for an interesting conversation about delusion. Granted, cults are typically extreme and follow a living person who calls themself god.
It puts you at an impasse. How do you talk to someone who refuses to think about anything concerning the bible? I have a friend like that. Very smart guy, but when I told him of my deconversion and of the fact that I couldn't validate the bible, he couldn't understand why I would want to do that. It's the BIBLE after all! Why does it need to be validated?
How does one reason with that mindset? One doesn't.
Christianity and religious thought in general is much easier. Just do what the preacher/book/pope says.
We're done here. Next!
I will admit that thinking about everything is hard, but I'm not wired any other way. I just do it. There are days when I wish I could just believe, but that's not me. I have to verify, prove, know. I drive my wife crazy, but that's who I am. And that's why I am no longer a Christian.
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